Are you experiencing divorce or going through another type of grueling battle that is affecting your life? It’s important to have the right people around you to encourage you and to offer you wise guidance. Today on Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe you will get to hear from some very experienced professionals who care and can help. Today I will be sharing some do’s and don’ts when it comes to divorce and your mortgage and credit. You will be hearing from Realtor Pat Goldstein, Budget Specialist Mark Loden, Asset Management and Wealth Advisor Mark Ruleman, Transformational Photographer Tammy Zurak, Attorney Andrew Hartsfield, and Health Benefit Specialist Lloyd Caldemeyer.
What do YOU want to accomplish with YOUR mortgage? Let’s talk about your home buying or refinancing plans. Connect with me at www.JoGarner.com (901) 482-0354 Jo@JoGarner.com Subscribe at www.JoGarner.com to get Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe weekly podcasts with show notes.
To Your Success,
Jo Garner, Mortgage Loan Officer NMLS# 757308
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LET’S GET A FRESH START THIS MORNING
Good morning, Memphis! Welcome to our internet listeners and podcast listeners across the 50 states! You’re on Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe. I’m your host, Jo Garner, Mortgage Loan Officer. You can connect with me at www.JoGarner.com. Our general topic is REAL ESTATE AND BUSINESS SOLUTIONS FOR MAKING A FRESH START DEALING WITH DIVORCE.Subscribe to get our weekly blogposts with podcasts at www.JoGarner.com. Call us while we are live at (901) 535-9732 Today is May 30th, 2020.
POSITIVE TRANSFORMATIONS
You may be going through a divorce or some other grueling battle that is forcing you to change your life and reevaluate who you are and where you want to go. You are having to spend time making legal and business decisions. It is also important to work on changing the way you think, transforming your thoughts and images. Renew your mind. Your eyes and words need to be focused on what you want, and not just what you have.
Our first guest, Tammy Zurak of Z Photog Studio, Tammy provides a transformational experience that her clients have said allowed them to relax and enjoy the photo session and really to fall in love with themselves again. Tammy Zurak, take a moment and introduce yourself. Share some of your wisdom with our audience who may be experiencing a rough season right now. (Tammy has about 2 minutes or so to share some wisdom from her industry with our audience and share a story to illustrate…)
Tammy’s customer story: A client had been through a particularly tough divorce with an alcoholic husband and was now taking care of three busy and active kids, running a household alone, and working full time. She was feeling pretty down on herself. She needed images for her business, so she came in because she had heard about what I do from a friend. But like most people, she didn’t necessarily think it would happen for her. She was amazed at the results and couldn’t believe it was her. I later ran into her at a networking event and she introduced me to someone in the most amazing way, she said “this is the photographer that took my pictures. She’s so amazing, I really didn’t think I was beautiful most of my adult life until she took my picture. When I saw what she did, I actually thought, “hey, I’m looking pretty good!” And I hear this all the time.
(Tammy’s closing comments …)
(Jo) Tammy, that is such an encouraging story. I have several mortgage clients -both men and women-who are in life-changing transitions. Many of their stories involve the loss of a loved one or the divorce process. When you were telling your story, it reminded, me of Carly Clemmon’s story (not her real name.)
Rising From the Ashes Following Divorce-Carley Clemmon’s story
(Avatar picture of Carley Clemmons)
Carley found herself in what felt like the ash heap of life following some grueling years going through a divorce process. She had to build back her credit and self confidence.
Divorce can be very devastating—not just financially but emotionally, and affects so many aspects of how people see life. Carley had been married for many years and she and her husband had always owned their own home. After the divorce she had to sell the house and go back to renting. It was over 3 years of building back her credit, paying off old bills and—reinventing herself as a person.
Carley had a choice to make. She could give in and let this resentment and negative events crush her into the dust, or she could choose to rise from the ashes, creating a quality life as a better person. Carley choose to forgive those who harmed her and reinvent herself–to recreate a life she would love, and help others in the process. A big part of living out this dream was to own her own home again. Carly would make the home her castle and security blanket—complete with a she-shed out back to enjoy her hobbies.
She found a house that she loved but she lacked funds to pay for the down payment and other costs. Down Payment Assistance enabled her to buy the house where she wanted to live. The down payment assistance program handed her the “keys” to start her new life.
What do YOU want to accomplish with YOUR mortgage? Make your plan. Work your plan. If the deal works for you today, let’s do it today. Connect with me at www.JoGarner.com or call me at (901) 482-0354 I want to hear your story.
Our next guest is realtor Pat Goldstein of Crye-Leike Realtors who is known as the “Gold Standard of Real Estate.” Pat what is best advice you can give to a home seller or home buyer who is going through the divorce process? Pat Goldstein launches her topics
You’re on Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe. I’m your host, Jo Garner, Mortgage Loan Officer. What do YOU want to accomplish with your mortgage? When we come back, you will be getting more ideas and nuggets from Realtor Pat Goldstein, Budget Specialist Mark Loden, Asset Manager & Wealth Advisor Mark Ruleman, Attorney Andrew Hartsfield and Health Benefit Advisor Lloyd Caldemeyer. See you back after this break.
2ND SEGMENT AFTER 9:15 BREAK AND BEFORE 9:30a BREAK
(Jo) coming back from 1st break after “Fight Song” transitional chorus says, “You’re back on Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe. What is YOUR Fight song right now? What is trying to take away who you are and what you love about your life? Whether it is a divorce, losing your job, your business or maybe your fight song is to regain your health. Whatever your fight is, you can win. Put the right people around you to encourage you and help guide you as you maneuver through the battle.”
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TOPICS COVERED BY TAMMY ZURAK, Z PHOTOG STUDIO
- Tammy describes what she does as a photographer.
- Offers encouragement to those going through a personal battle
- Tammy to transition to her story …
Story: A client had been through a particularly tough divorce with an alcoholic husband and was now taking care of three busy and active kids, running a household alone, and working full time. She was feeling pretty down on herself. She needed images for her business, so she came in because she had heard about what I do from a friend. But like most people, she didn’t necessarily think it would happen for her. She was amazed at the results and couldn’t believe it was her. I later ran into her at a networking event and she introduced me to someone in the most amazing way, she said “this is the photographer that took my pictures. She’s so amazing, I really didn’t think I was beautiful most of my adult life until she took my picture. When I saw what she did, I actually thought, “hey, I’m looking pretty good!” And I hear this all the time.
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In the 2nd segment after 9:15AM break and before 9:30 break
(Jo briefly introduces Pat Goldstein)
TOPICS COVERED BY PAT GOLDSTEIN, REALTOR CRYE-LEIKE REALTORS
- What are your top tips for a home seller who is going through a divorce?
- What are your top tips for a buyer going through a divorce?
- What other tips from your realtor expertise can you give your clients who are dealing with divorce?
(Share an example story here?)
(Jo introduces Mark Loden)
TOPICS COVERED BY MARK LODEN, MKL PERSONAL BUDGETING SERVICE
- What is the best advice you have given your budget clients who are considering divorce or already divorced?
- Any other practical tips you can give on the budgeting in a divorce situation?
- (can you share a short example story here?)
(Jo introduces Mark Ruleman)
TOPICS COVERED BY MARK RULEMAN, RULEMAN ASSET MANAGEMENT
- What best advice from the asset management, wealth advisor expert have you given your clients who are dealing with divorce situations?
- Any other advice you would offer?
- (any short story examples you can share?)
(Jo introduces Lloyd Caldemeyer)
TOPICS COVERED BY LLOYD CALDEMEYER, UNITED HEALTH ADVISORS
- What is the very best advice you would offer a health benefit client who is facing issues with divorce?
- Any other advice?
- (any short example stories you can share to illustrate a point?)
(Jo briefly introduces Andrew Hartsfield)
TOPICS COVERED BY ANDREW HARTSFIELD, ATTORNEY HARTSFIELD LAW MEMPHIS
- First thing is to make sure you are giving your marriage a fair shake. Talk to each other about any problems you are having, Talk to your minister or religious leader, get counseling. The best divorces are the ones that are never initiated.
- It’s okay for one person in the marriage to take the lead on the finances, but never let your spouse keep you in the dark on anything money related. Financial abuse is a very real thing and can be as devastating as any other types of abuse.
- Before you actually get divorced, try to get a handle on your financial situation and get copies of all your bank records, financial statements, and tax returns, and all of your spouse’s because it can be harder to access later especially if you are no longer living together.
- Be very careful about what you say and especially be careful about what you post on social media. Think of yourself as a criminal defendant and remember that anything you say can and will be held against you. Seemingly innocent statements can be blown out of proportion in the world of divorce. If you want to delete your facebook or twitter account, do it before you file because if you delete your accounts afterwards that is considered destroying evidence.
- As much as you can, avoid the urge to settle personal scores or air dirty laundry in litigation. Judges have seen all kinds of human behavior, and it never looks good for anybody when unflattering events come out, and more often than not is simply adds to your legal bills.
- Have the mindset of a negotiator. Expect your spouse to come out with his or her fair share of the property, but don’t give away the store either, especially if you are simply in a hurry to get your divorce finalized and on with your life. On that note, listen to your lawyer’s advice and especially pay attention when your lawyer is telling you what the law is, because that will give you a better idea as to what is fair and what isn’t.
- (can you share a short story example to illustrate how you can help your divorce clients?)
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3rd segment after 9:30 am break and before 9:40 break
TOPICS COVERED BY JO GARNER, MORTGAGE LOAN OFFICER:
- What options do I have for my house and mortgage following divorce? (Do’s and Don’ts)
If it is clear that you will be required to refinance your existing mortgage and pay off your spouse or get him or her off the loan, it is easier to get approved and closed on a loan BEFORE you file divorce than during the divorce procedure OR AFTER the divorce decree and marital dissolution agreement is finalized and legally recorded. Mortgage companies and title companies can be very skittish about your ability to qualify if, during the procedure you are suddenly required to pay a higher amount in child support or alimony. Since nothing is truly carved in stone until the final divorce decree and martial dissolution if filed, this leaves a lot of risk for you and the mortgage company on your ability to pay the monthly note.
Talk with your lender.
Title companies have work-arounds in some cases, but if you are still legally married or separated but not divorced, most states have laws that give spouses marital rights to a primary residence even if they did not sign the deed or the mortgage. Talk with your real estate closing attorney
If you need to refinance and pay off the spouse and get them off the deed, mortgage companies have special refinance programs that allow you to buy out your departing spouse without the tighter restrictions applied to a cash out refinance. Be sure and consult with your divorce attorney about making sure that the equity AND the cost of the refinance are both considered in the split. Consult with your divorce attorney and your lender.
If you are going to be depending on child support or alimony or separate maintenance income from your ex spouse, some loan programs require that you show that you have a court order that amount of income and that you have received it in full for 3 months to 6 months per the monthly agreement.
If you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse already have an agreement on the amount of child support when you first start the divorce process, consider having your child support come to you right away, so that by the time the divorce is complete, you have the necessary history of getting the full child support and can probably use it to qualify for your new home purchase or refinance. Consult with lender, your attorney and financial advisor.
If you are planning to buy a new home or refinance your home, remember that most of your standard mortgage programs will not use child support income, alimony or separate maintenance income that you are getting from your spouse unless the marital dissolution agreement shows that you are entitled to this income for at least 36 months or more from the date of your home loan CLOSING.
Another good point to remember is that mortgage companies typically do not count child support income on any child that will turn 18 years old within less than 36 months from the mortgage closing date. There are exceptions to the rule as long as the legal agreement on the time the ex is to pay the support is not conditional.
One of my clients a while back was a very smart gal. She went over this same points before officially starting through the divorce process. She made sure that she would get alimony from her ex-husband for a minimum of 5 years. (If she had allowed him to pay for 3 years, the time remaining to receive the support would already be less than 36 months when she went to close her loan. )
- What can I do to protect my credit before, during and after a divorce? (Do’s and Don’ts)
Get your name off of any accounts that are in the control of your spouse, so that it will be harder to get stuck with paying the bill on it. Doing it as soon as possible reduces the chance that the spouse would not pay the bill, dropping your credit scores. Even if the marital dissolution agreement states that the spouse is responsible for the mortgage payment or any other payments on accounts, YOU ARE STILL RESPONSIBLE under the contractual agreement with the mortgage company and other accounts that has your name on them.
Making your payments on time and keeping your balances under 30% of the credit limit on credit cards in your name tends to put more points on the board for your credit score. If you are disciplined not to over spend on credit cards, you might try raising the credit limits but not charging more than usual so that your percentage borrowed each month is easily showing under 30% usage.
- Joseph Jeffords Story – “I love my kids. I want a house that I can make a home where they will love to come spend time with their dad.”
The one thing Joseph Jeffords loved more than life were his two elementary school age sons, Jimmy and Jack. Joseph tried everything to keep his family together, but his wife wanted a divorce and she wanted full custody of their two sons.
Joseph was heartbroken and financially hurting too. His credit was messed up from some jointly held bills that the martial dissolution agreement said was his wife’s responsibility to pay. She didn’t. The creditors came after Joseph anyway. Nothing seemed fair.
Joseph worked two jobs, paid more legal fees and fought to keep custody of his children. Nothing seemed to work. But, he sought wise advice from some reputable professionals, after several attempts, the agreement allowed his boys to stay with him every other weekend and alternating holidays.
It took Joseph about a year to get his credit cleaned up and a little emergency savings put back. When he came to get preapproved for his mortgage he said, “ I love my kids. I want a house that I can make a home where they will love to come spend time with their dad.”
Joseph put a good realtor on his team and got his home with a low, affordable payment and very little down payment. The low house payment made the treehouse and other fun times with his children affordable. The
low money down left him with his emergency fund and a lot of peace of mind.
(4th segment after 9:45A segment and 9:57 closing music)
REAL ESTATE TIP OF THE WEEK (Jo Garner and whoever is in the studio or still on the line has a short moment to share a real estate related money-saving or time-saving tip related to their industry or a tip related to the topic for this episode):
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Talk Shoppe offers free networking & education to anyone interested in real estate or in business. Talk Shoppe meets every Wednesday 9A-10A CT at Concorde Career College 5100 Poplar Ave 1st floor Memphis, TN. This Wednesday June 3rd 2020 Talk Shoppe presents: June 3rd; 2020: Dr. Rachna Jain, “Five Non-Obvious Health Implications of Social Distancing, and Five Things You Can Do to Come Out Stronger” https://yourcompletewellbeing.com, 608-332-0107
Talk Shoppe events are free thanks to advertisers like Troy and Lynn McDonald with Erin McDonald Insurance Agency in Bartlett, TN (901) 849-7101 for your property and casualty insurance – your home, your vacation home and investment properties too
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5. Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe reminds you to MAKE YOUR PLAN. LET’S WORK YOUR PLAN. IF THE DEAL WORKS FOR YOU TODAY, DO IT TODAY.
SPECIAL NOTE: REAL ESTATE MORTGAGE SHOPPE RECOMMENDS THAT YOU CONSULT WITH A FINANCIAL, LEGAL OR OTHER CERTIFIED, LICENSED PROFESSIONAL BEFORE ACTING OR INVESTING ON ANYTHING YOU HEAR OR SEE FROM THE CONTENT ON THIS SHOW OR BLOG POSTS. THE INFORMATION WE SHARE ON REAL ESTATE MORTGAGE SHOPPE IS GENERAL IN NATURE MEANT FOR GENERAL EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. ALL EXAMPLES GIVEN FOR ILLUSTRATION PURPOSES ON REAL ESTATE MORTGAGE SHOPPE AND ARE BASED ON TRUE STORIES BUT WE USE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS AND DO NOT DIRECTLY REFLECT REAL PEOPLE OR EXACT DETAILS IN ANY OF THE SITUATIONS.
QUOTE CORNER:
Pinterest “Just because the past didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to doesn’t mean the future can’t be better than you ever imagined.”
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REJOINDERS:
- Nita Black, Business strategist showing you how to make money online with your skills and expertise www.901ELearn.com
- Tom King, Real Estate Appraiser with Bill King Appraisal Company (9010 487-6989
- Eric Eurich, Kaizen award-winning Business Coach with Focal Point Business Coaching-Getting you where you need to be (901) 340-9558
Transitional Music: “My Fight Song” by Rachel Platten; “Stronger” by Kelly Clarkson; “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey; “Memphis” by Johnny Rivers for the Look Back Memphis Trivia Contest
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ABOUT TAMMY ZURAK, Z PHOTOG STUDIO
Tammy Zurak, owner/photographer at Z Photog Studio
Before starting her portrait photography and business brand mentoring business in 2012, she spent a lifetime climbing the corporate ladder. She loved the transition of moving into her own portrait business because she was reconnecting with the human side of people. People often shy away from having portraits taken because they feel uncomfortable with themselves. As we age, we tend to change in ways we sometimes don’t appreciate when we look in the mirror. Tammy provides a transformational experience that her clients have said “allowed me to relax and enjoy the session and really to fall in love with myself again”. She reflects back to them what she sees without all the baggage they carry in their head. It’s a great thing to do after a divorce, it allows you to start fresh with something you love, you!
Story: A client had been through a particularly tough divorce with an alcoholic husband and was now taking care of three busy and active kids, running a household alone, and working full time. She was feeling pretty down on herself. She needed images for her business, so she came in because she had heard about what I do from a friend. But like most people, she didn’t necessarily think it would happen for her. She was amazed at the results and couldn’t believe it was her. I later ran into her at a networking event and she introduced me to someone in the most amazing way, she said “this is the photographer that took my pictures. She’s so amazing, I really didn’t think I was beautiful most of my adult life until she took my picture. When I saw what she did, I actually thought, “hey, I’m looking pretty good!” And I hear this all the time.
Tammy
Zurak
Z PHOTOG STUDIO
758 Walnut Knoll Lane, Suite 202
Cordova, TN 38018
Call or Text: 901-500-5841
ABOUT PAT GOLDSTEIN
The “Gold Standard In Real Estate”
Crye-Leike Realtors
For buying or selling residential real estate
For West TN and North Mississippi
(901) 606-2000
ABOUT MARK LODEN OF MKL MONTHLY BUDGETING SERVICE
Welcome to the MKL Personal Budget Planning Experience!
My name is Mark Loden, counselor and founder of MKL Personal Budget Planning System. I do not sell investments or insurance of any kind. I am a budget specialist and I teach people the Essential Tools for managing their personal finances through a monthly bill paying budget plan. My service is simple and straight forward; not a ball and chain, but an organized plan that includes all your monthly budget needs and will help you to:
- Pay bills on time and stop collection agency phone calls
- Pay down debt such as credit cards, personal loans, etc.
- Set aside money for future needs such as clothes, car maintenance, vacations, savings and much more
- Learn how to manage your money so well that at any given time of the month, you will be able to know where you stand with regard to groceries, gasoline, savings, etc, in order to monitor your priorities and see them become reality.
It is a “Fiscal Fitness Plan” for your personal finances!
901.624.0052 Office
ABOUT MARK B. RULEMAN
Ruleman Asset Management & Planning
(901) 488-8228
Bringing over 32 years of investment experience including the last twenty-five as a discretionary investment manager, Mark formed Ruleman Asset Management & Planning & joined Independent Financial Group in 2019. His emphasis has been in understanding the big picture, applying effective asset allocations, and utilizing financial planning to help clients meet their needs and goals. Skilled in utilizing insurance solutions for clients, Mark also addresses long term and retirement needs to not run out of income for life.
He and his wife, Mary, are proud parents of three grown children and enjoy University of Mississippi football weekends in the Grove. Mark also enjoys reading, tennis, hunting and fishing. Believing the importance of supporting the local community, Mark is active on the board of Theatre Memphis and Germantown Chamber of Commerce. He is a past board member of the Memphis Rotary and LifeBlood, the regional blood center. He has also been recognized as a Paul Harris Fellow of Rotary International.
ABOUT LLOYD J. CALDEMEYER
Representing
US Health Advisors- A United HealthCare Company
Call or Text 901-338-2501
Utilizing over 22 years of Health insurance experience in both individual and group benefits, Lloyd brings easy to understand solutions to help individuals, families, small business owners and self-employed individuals. He helps them explore all their options to insure they obtain affordable and high value health care coverage so they can avoid financial ruin due to high costs associated with medical expenses.
Lloyd’s years of experience and in-depth knowledge of the benefits industry and what works for his client’s businesses make him an unusually professional resource and what many have relied on as the go-to guy. Lloyd’s good counsel and sound plan designs bring tremendous value. He brings unparalleled passion and enthusiasm in helping others. Licensed in 20 states.
Lloyd enjoys cooking, gardening and helping others. He has been a mentor to troubled youths at Youth Villages and is active in his men’s group helping others in the community.
ABOUT ATTORNEY ANDREW HARTSFIELD
(901) 526-6000
Attorney Andrew Hartsfield has deep roots in the Memphis, Tennessee area and in the Memphis legal profession in particular. He practices law with his father, and between the two they have nearly 70 years of experience in the practice of law.
Andrew’s practice is uniquely broad-based in nature and covers multiple disciplines. Seeing different areas of the law interact together allows him to find creative solutions to legal problems that might be overlooked otherwise. Having a working knowledge of different legal disciplines also allows him to get up to speed quickly in preparing for cases. Andrew also has a great deal of experience in legal research. He has worked for a Federal district court judge and appellate court judge, insuring that decisions made were legally sound and based on legal precedent.
Andrew has handled numerous divorce and domestic relations cases, including some that have gone to trial, and he is experienced in navigating the emotional aspects of dealing through this difficult time, providing compassion whenever it is warranted but also giving practical advice.
Andrew proudly represents clients from all walks of life and is eager to help any type of client if he has the ability
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ABOUT JO GARNER-MORTGAGE LOAN OFFICER:
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO ACCOMPLISH WITH YOUR MORTGAGE?
www.JoGarner.com (901) 482 0354 jo@jogarner.com twitter @jogarner NMLS# 757308 (currently working with Sierra Pacific Mortgage, Inc)
“Whatever YOUR personal priorities are, my job is to help you get the mortgage terms that will give you bragging rights when you talk about it and help you score on hitting your goals .”
As a mortgage loan officer, my job is to help you get to the benefits you want from your financing terms. What is most important to you? I can help you find the financing terms that will help you get to what you want. What is your comfort level on a house payment? How much are you comfortable paying down,? What type of financing do you need to get the house you want to buy or refinance?
Different clients have different priorities in life—some are buying their first home with very little down payment funds. Some are recovering from medical challenges, divorces or preparing to send children to college and some are embarking on a long term goal of buying properties to build rental income.”
Jo Garner is a mortgage officer with extensive knowledge in tailoring mortgages to her customers who are refinancing or purchasing homes all over the country. She offers conventional, FHA, VA or other loan programs for refinancing and purchases.
Jo can help you look at rent vs buy, when it makes sense to refinance, how to get the best deal on your home purchase financing.
Jo Garner has been in the real estate/financing business for over 25 years. She got her start in Portland, Maine where she first began her real estate career. She received her real estate education from the University of Southern Maine and was personally mentored in San Diego, California by Robert G. Allen, author of Nothing Down, Creating Wealth and The Challenge.
On moving back to West Tennessee in 1987, she went into business buying and selling discounted owner-financed notes secured on real estate. In 1990 Jo went to work for a residential mortgage company and has been a mortgage loan officer for over 25 years. Her goal is to offer excellent, affordable service to her customers, tailoring the loan programs to the specific needs of her clients.
In addition to her work in the mortgage field, Jo Garner is the primary sponsor and founder of Talk Shoppe in Memphis. www.TalkShoppe.com Jo Garner also host the radio show Real Estate Mortgage Shoppe airing on News Radio AM 600 WREC and iHeart Radio with podcasts and show notes published on www.JoGarner.com